What am I supposed to say in these things?
Glub glub glub
Uhm...
Hello there? Welcome? This is where I post things and act a fool on a regular basis? Probably terribly awkward? I don't know how to respond to people? I saw a flying pickle once?
What am I supposed to say?
George, Ralph, and the pig with the curly tailposted Apr 10th 2012, 5:42PM
Mood: Squiggly
Music: Drag her round the road - Dervish
Story by: My father
Told by: Me
Accuracy: What I remember.
Once upon a time there were two brothers, one named George, the other named Ralph. Together, these two brothers owned a farm, and in that farm was a very special pig. This pig was named Petunia, and she was a very prized pig because she had a beautifully straight, long tail.
Now, because Petunia had such a beautiful tail, George and Ralph decided it was time to take her to the county fair again; there's no way she'd lose with such a straight tail! So off went Ralph, who hopped into the truck, and off went George, who sat in the bed of the truck with Petunia, and off they all went to go to the county fair.
While on the country road, Ralph drove as fast as he could (he didn't want to be late!) and didn't slow as he turned a bend, causing the door to the bed of the truck to fly open! Petunia began to slide out, but thinking fast George grabbed onto her beautiful straight, long tail, struggling to keep Petunia in the truck! But alas, George's grip was getting weaker and weaker, and out went Petunia and she landed in the brush on the side of the road.
"Oh my tail," cried Petunia as she brought herself out of the brush. "Oh, it aches! It aches!" She turned to check her beautiful tail, and wailed at the site of it. "My tail! Oh, my beautifully straight tail! It's changed!" And she cried and cried, not wanting to look at her now curly tail because she thought it was such an abomination.
Soon, George and Ralph came back to find her - they were so worried! - and found her bawling and said, "Petunia! We found you!" And when they saw her curly tail their eyes widened and they said, "Petunia! Your tail! It's beautiful!" Now, Petunia didn't believe them, but when they ushered her back into the truck she went, sniffling and snuffling over the loss of her beautiful straight tail as Ralph drove slowly to the fair.
At the fair, to Petunia's surprise and pleasure, Petunia won first because everyone was entranced by that little, beautiful, curly tail. They all said, "That tail! It's so small and pretty, and it's just oh so curly! We want our pigs to have curly tails like that!" and so, George and Ralph gave Petunia the honor of producing a brood of baby pigs and to this day, every pig with a little beautiful curly tail can trace it's own lineage to Petunia, the first pig to ever have a little, beautiful, curly tail.
And that, children, is the story of why pigs have curly tails.
Who wants to hear the legend of the Magical Hippo next?
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